It's For Your Own Protection

Right at the beginning of this blog I referred to anxiety as the bastard offspring of fear and imagination.I also  talked of fear giving us the means to deal with an actual, present danger, and thus the means to protect ourselves from harm. Anxiety performs the same function with regard to possible, imagined future threats, threats which don't exist but which anxiety treats as if they do.

I've also mentioned Freud's belief that emotions too powerful to express get buried in the subconscious part of the mind where they fester, perhaps for very many years. Freud also said something else which I have found helpful. He said that at a deep level people resist being cured of their neurosis, because, bad as it may be, what it is protecting them from is even worse (as they see it).

How does this relate to existential anxiety? Very simply, your mind will offer you all kinds of good reasons why you should shrink from tackling the problem *now*.

This is not the right time. Your protective mechanism will always tell you this; there is no absolute right time.

I can deal with it myself, slowly. Sorry, if that were true you would have dealt with it long ago - or even at the time these things happened.

I don't want people to think I'm making it all up or exaggerating. Mental health professionals won't think this at all. They have long experience of people imprisoned by distress like yours (though the causes may be different).

It would be better to walk away now so that someone more worthy may have the benefit of their expertise. No it wouldn't. You have been assessed by people who know what they are doing and have judged that you need and deserve the benefit of their intervention.

I don't want to have them lose patience with me and discharge me before I'm ready. They won't. They are in this for the long haul and they know it will be a lengthy and difficult process for you. They are prepared for it to take as long as it takes.

It's going to hurt too much. I would do better just to learn to live with it. Well at least there's some truth in that; it will hurt and that's why your mind shies away from dealing with it. But, it will not be more than you can endure, and you will be worse trying to live with it, not better. You survived the process that damaged you so badly; you will survive the painful process of healing.

An infected appendix requires surgery which leaves a painful incision wound. Rejecting surgery leads on to a ruptured appendix which results in peritonitis, shortly followed by death.

Have I missed any of your 'reasons' off my list? Tell me what they are and I'll explain why they too are excuses. 😄